"We cannot live our lives constantly looking back, listening back, lest we be turned to pillars of longing and regret, but to live without listening at all is to live deaf to the fullness of the music."
~ Frederick Buechner
It is easy when you are in the winter of your life to look backwards. All those years that are behind you have memories stored in your head. What a life I have led. The memories blow around like kites in the wind…my school years, college, marriage, children, career. I have cherished memories that resurface when I want to remember happy times. But I have never been one to dwell on the past. There is too much present and future for me. I try to keep current.
Once when my son and his boys were riding in the car I was singing the words to the latest hits on the radio. He was so surprised that his seventy year old mother could do that. And he also is proud of me for keeping up with technology as well as I have. I try to move forward with my life continuing to travel and learn new things. I don’t want to get stale. To sit around watching tv all day. Carpe diem.
You are so right, it is very easy at my age to look back, maybe because I know there is more life behind than before me? Now I'm being forced to look forward and it's scary but kind of wonderful. Scary because I don't know everything that's ahead, but then do any of us really know that? But wonderful because we're being shaken out of our rut. It will be hard not to look in that rearview mirror because I'm leaving behind lots of good stuff, stuff and people and what I know. But there can be wonderful ahead too, I'm trusting in that. Most of the time. Except when it's late at night and I'm exhausted. Then the doubts creep in. But morning brings new hope for new experiences.
ReplyDeleteI don't want to let regret rob me of that. Your post was written for my heart this morning, Peggy.